Fallout: Exodus: The Road to Funk

You can’t miss what you can’t measure
Tiger tiger

3/2/13- Exodus: Road to Funk- You can’t miss what you can’t measure-
The Caravan realized it had been going south instead of north and paused on the edge of a settlement being raided by Legion. As soon as they realized what they were approaching everyone threw off contraband. Having papers in order the caravan made some small trades with the raiders and followed directions north. At this point the players chose to scavenge tossed of contraband.

Randall chose to cross examine one of the caravan traders who showed suspicious behavior during the Legion inspection. What information he obtained from her remains between them. Aria received information from Bruce, but nothing of importance to their current mission.

The group was then sent out to collect food to help make up for supplies spent traveling. They were asked to bring back at least one Big-horner, and instead Sven started a stampede involving 22 mole rats. The molerats overwhelmed the group and took the life of Randall. The next day Aria, Sven and another member of the caravan named King Rex went out and successfully hunted a Big Horn.

Supplied up, the group made their way to the “Craters of the Moon.” A former national park in southern Idaho. Their they were greeted by beautiful murals painted from chalk and mosaics of the stars made from broken bottles, bits of metal, and other shiny things. They were greeted at the entrance to a series of caves by a rhinestone lined robot named the Bootzilla-bot.

The Bootzilla-bot welcomed everyone to Chocolate City and took them to a cave where a ghoul named George Clinton introduced himself. He turns out to be a survivor of the apocalypse who has created a society “on the one” and in them image of “Funkentelecy.” During this period the caravan leader, Jeremiah, was dubbed the Starchild-what this means, no one knows.

Clinton informed the group of a rival city called Groovless Bootay, run by an incarnation of Sir Nose Devoid of funk. He expressed a concern the caravan may be harboring people promoting Zero-Funkativity and asked them to complete a series of tasks set forth by Bootzilla-bot.

Bootzilla-bot’s first assignment involved ridding their cattle of a pesky tiger. Sven, Aria, and Rex chose to purchase TNT from the shaky explosives dealer, Barbra, and successfully killed the tiger though a combination of good tactics, explosives, and bullets. The tiger killed and the group victorious Bootzilla-bot met them on the path back to town, congratulated them, and informed them of their next mission: Unite Chocolate City with the schismatic group known as the Thumpasorus people.

A new journey begins
Why not?

We’re starting a new chapter in exodus. A different story line is being picked up, and I’m not funking with you. Are you funking with me?

and then...
recap, what happened last game, exodus, fallout, fallout exodus, django, western, bears, molerats, cults, tribals, old west, post apoc, post appocolytpic, post apocalyptic, d20 modern, character death, new vegas, caliente,

As you came closer and closer to old Milford you found several bodies that had been killed and the brains removed. The bodies had started to stack to an alarming rate, when you saw the city on the horizon, in flames.

Bruce and Calvin lead two parties into the city, to discover that most of the buildings have been marked in a systematic manner, and that none of the citizens are left. What they do find are a bunch of blood thirsty zombies, and tracks leading away from town towards some hills. The tracks were vague but seemed to suggest human sized creatures and super mutants.

When the party confronted Bruce about following the tracks, he reminded them that they had been hired to keep the caravan safe, and that Jeremiah needed them now more than ever. It turns out the trade in this town was crucial to the journey, and Jeremiah will now have to cut the caravan in half and send some of them south to the former Legion Capital of Flagstaff.

The next morning everyone woke up and began a route towards Ogden. After a day of travel Elphie realized you were going south instead of north, and brought it up to Jeremiah who informed you that Ogden moves. It seems New Canaan has become a mobile location for the remaining Mormons and tribal’s who associate with them. Calvin seems very interested to learn this information.

After entering the valley leading to the meet up point with the tribal’s, you were attacked by two Yaoi Guai Bears. Camel and Calvin perish in the battle. While mourning the loss of Camel, you discovered that Calvin was in fact a spy for Caesar’s Legion and had been sending messages about what you were doing using an a codex….he accidently left at your disposal.

The tribal’s initiated trade with you, and tipped you off about a town called Caliente to the west. Before you could lead you were approached by a young Swallow Shaman named Dromedary (a kind of camel), who informed you that he wanted to join the group in order to learn more about healing. You accepted him as member to your party, replacing the position formerly held by Camel.

Your trip started out eventfully, when you ha d to clean 10 mole rats off the road. During this session Thad became violently ill, causing a Mole Rat to become violently Ill. Thad then grappled the ill mole rat, trying to use him as a weapon to beat the other mole rats to death with. He was unsuccessful…and also unsuccessful in taming the vomit covered mole rat, so he then beat it to death. The rest of the group successfully cleared the other 9 mole rats off the road.

On the way to Caliente a Ghoul snuck up on Rosa and put a gun to her back. Leading her to the front of the line the ghoul explained he did this because people usually shot first and asked questions later when it came to ghouls. He stated that he was fleeing a bad set of circumstances and wanted a safe trip to New Reno where he would then travel north to Gecko, a ghoul city.

The caravan arrived safely at Caliente, and you met up with Sherriff Beady. Elphie and Dromedary then seduced Sheriff Beady, only to have Elphie perform so poorly that she was immediately kicked out of the bedroom. While these shenanigans were going on, Thad, Rodger (the ghoul) and Rosa watched as a man approached the town dragging a coffin behind him. He asked for the bunk house and Thad had Jeremiah give him directions. When you asked him what was in the coffin the man responded “Who knows, could be my mother” and headed off.

Thad, Rosa, Rodger, and Elphie then went and traded goods. The finally place they arrived at was the Sunshine Shop(recommended by the sheriff) which had an old woman inside running it named Gertrude. Gertrude traded a favor for some hair beads for Rosa, and a favor for a snow globe showing a vault boy and the old (New Vegas) tops casino. She had both Rosa and Thad sign their contracts for the favor and turned to Elphie. Elphie refused the favor, and traded in two nudie picture books you’d taken with you at Silus the Centurion’s suggestion. Elphie received 3000 caps and a ballerina statue (like one she had as a child), but ended up owing no favors. She told Rodger she had nothing to offer him.

The group then met in the bar, (Dromedary and the Sherriff included), when mysterious man with the coffin came in. Upset by the lack of Lesbians Elphie started to allow the mysterious fellow to buy her drinks. Elphie, Thad, and Dromedary took this as an opportunity to ask the stranger about himself. The man revealed that his name is Django, and told them that what was in the coffin was “business” and that he was here investigating some weird murders where brains went missing. Otherwise he was tight lipped, but happy to buy the pretty red headed Elphie drinks. The sheriff assumed he was a mortician who traveled.

Elphie then allowed Django to seduce her and ended up having wild sex in the bunkhouse, uncaring who watched. When the game ended everyone was in the bar except for Elphie and Django.

That time the sheriff came to save us

So we killed 2 radioactive moths inside of the abandoned building that had the feral cats in front of it. That was fine, all fine, except then we were almost murdered by the spider swarms upstairs. I know guys. I know. I made that conflict way to hard, and you were rolling like crap, luckily Sheriff Petey saved the day.

So you only got paid 200 coins and made out with half the loot you were promised. Still have your lives though, and that’s what counts.

That’s when you realized the 3 days you were unconscious left you with precious little time to make it back to New Reno so you could meet up with Courier Six and run that Caravan out to souther Utah. LUckly you made it,but not before being stopped by a man at the gates who asked you to give a letter to someone in New Reno named Maria Saint Lawrence. Unfortunately Elphie broke the seal on it and left it in the hotel room, vowing to deal with the letter another day.

As the caravan set out for the evening you came across another caravan that had been destroyed, the tops of the heads and the brains of the caravaners missing. You found a weird symbol laying in the dirt there, and Elphie took it for safe keeping.

You ran across several ants, and killed them with the help of Bruce.

You then made it to the Centipede House, only to discover that Silus the Centurion was waiting for you with several men, and a weird merchant was there who had stopped for trade named Calvin. Silus struck a deal with Bruce aka Courier Six about letting you guys disable the traps in the house so he could gets some books Caesar wants that Tobuscus was rumored to have. Thad nearly blew himself up in the process, but you retrieved the circuit board, and made it to the rear where Silus rewarded you with several valuable books.

You also checked the computer Tobuscus had you take apart. It turns out the computer was hooked into an NCR information network and you discovered that Maria Saint Lawrence the woman you were supposed to give the letter to is rumored to be the leader of some sort of cult, and her daddy is supposed to be ex enclave.

ELphie then seduced Robert, one of the head merchants for the caravan, in exchange for a night in Tobucus’s bed, and you spent the rest of the night resting up

Wayward Ho
Sex, Radroaches, and rock and roll

On the last adventure everyone resupplied in New Reno.

After Elphie and Rosa had a good ole’ time down at the gay bar, they met up with Thad and Camel who had both made a lot of money at their chosen professions.

The meeting with Coronal Moore was successful, and they were given the 150lbs moose head, despite having found a computer component int he head. The moose-head is currently being saved in Thad’s room because of how much weight it takes up on the donkey.

They also met up with Robert, who shared some information about his coworker Bruce Elmetto, also known as Courier Six, who seems to be rather notorious with the NCR, and has been selling uniforms he salvaged from Hoover Dam. Robert convinced the group to join Eastern Sands Caravan as it is progressing towards a place Tobuscus has sent the group, and during the meeting with Lori and Jeremiah (the owners), Elphie was hit on by Bruce.

It turns out that Jesse, Joey, and Danny all have jobs at the tops, and were happy to share juice and hugs with our adventurers.

After recovering from a wild night full of juice the gang went south to Little Washoe and were contracted to kill the cats that were keeping people out of the Blunder Griffin paper company. Sheriff Petey The Sheriff will only surrender the money if the adventurers clean out the abandoned building, and our session ended when the group was going back to town after killing 5 rad roaches. They were all headed to town to rest and try to fix Thad’s weapon.

Welcome to your Adventure Log!
A blog for your campaign

Every campaign gets an Adventure Log, a blog for your adventures!

While the wiki is great for organizing your campaign world, it’s not the best way to chronicle your adventures. For that purpose, you need a blog!

The Adventure Log will allow you to chronologically order the happenings of your campaign. It serves as the record of what has passed. After each gaming session, come to the Adventure Log and write up what happened. In time, it will grow into a great story!

Best of all, each Adventure Log post is also a wiki page! You can link back and forth with your wiki, characters, and so forth as you wish.

One final tip: Before you jump in and try to write up the entire history for your campaign, take a deep breath. Rather than spending days writing and getting exhausted, I would suggest writing a quick “Story So Far” with only a summary. Then, get back to gaming! Grow your Adventure Log over time, rather than all at once.

Kinky Kelly and the Sexy Tobuscus
January 22 2012

Today we realized that no one was getting to Tobuscus’s house with out some help. So we convinced Swank, the head of the Chairmen, to give up his Donkey show Donkey. Thus we liberated Kelly from a lifetime of sexual abuse, and also gave Camel, the group’s prostitute, her spiked collar.

The first thing we came across was a run down gas station with a very angry lizard inside. It’s okay, he’s to dead to be angry anymore.

Convincing Kelly we were not going to rape her, we then went forward to see Tobuscus’s place, but ran into Danney, Joey, and Jesse. They were three very special raiders with a very special message about being true to yourself. Camel also talked them out of their hand gun, sniper rifle, and laser pistol.

After that we moved past a Yaoi Guai all sneaky like.

Once we arrived at Tobucsus’s house, he told us his real name is Toby, and that he needed us to kill “the clicky murder death creatures” that were keeping him from his tool box. During this adventure we killed 3 pesky rad-roaches that were eating some old moldy cardboard. Then we discovered that the threat facing Toby was in fact 3 mirelurks. Unfortunately Camel’s gun discharged prematurely and nearly killed Rosa (the ex raider) while we were fighting off the last Mirelurk. The last Mirelurk, killed off by a swift punch by Thad of the Chairmen, we returned to Toby for our reward of 100 caps each and some rad-x.

Toby then told us that we were worthy enough to complete three tasks for him:
1. get the moose head from Col Moore in the NCR’s offices, Col Moore is a cutie.
2. get the computer chip from his Caterpillar house, it’s in the back of the house, look out for mines.
3. get the green box from Blunder Griffin Paper Company, look for Pam’s desk.


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